Yesterday, America celebrated its independence…honestly, I am not feeling it. As a black woman in America, I only feel free to a certain extent. In the last 30 days, we have experienced Juneteenth, the overturning of Roe v Wade, celebrating “freedom,” and ending with a mass shooting. And if you can not feel the impact or see the significance in that timeline, then you are a part of the problem.

When the constitution was written, slavery existed, and I would not have been considered human. An amendment “freed” my ancestors. Do we need to add an amendment to declare women are human beings and have the right to “freely” decide about their bodies? Amendments granted women and people of color the right to vote. Banning abortion is controlling a woman’s right to freedom…So no, I am not feeling the “freedom” of being an American. I am not feeling the “freedom” of Juneteeth. Being a millennial with the right to choose, only to have that right taken away in my lifetime, is baffling! It is disheartening to think about what else will be revoked because it will not stop with Roe v Wade.

I woke up this morning with that thought. I then thought of the younger generations in my family, one in particular. When she was younger, she stated she wanted a bakery. That stuck with me; not sure if it did with her, as she’s twelve now. I thought about generational curses, trauma, and access to, or lack thereof, generational wealth. Due to slavery, Jim Crow, segregation, etc., generational wealth does not exist for many black families in this country. How will my cousin get her bakery? Will she have the right to choose again in the future? Will she, as a black woman in America, even have the right to vote or own property? Will she have access to preventive care? Those thoughts turned into tears. Unbeknown to her and others within my family, I’m working to build generational wealth. I do not have children of my own and do not plan to; however, I want my cousin to have her bakery without any hardships. But it appears difficulties may come in other forms.

It is hard to feel free or hope during these times. It raises the question, what else can I do besides voting and marching? Knowing Georgia will potentially ban abortion? A state where there are some parts I am not welcome due to my skin color? However, I will continue striving to voice my opinion. I will continue to fight. I will continue to be defiant and exercise these “freedoms,” even when I only feel free-ish.